Sunday, June 2, 2013

I got 99 problems and being rich isn't one of them

It's nearly 4am and I have work at 10am. It's been a couple of off, weird days. Don't get me wrong; there have been some fun times as well.

Things have been tough with finances. Rent is costing everything we have and more. I'm broke, with $17 in my bank account. I don't have enough money to buy my mood stabilizer and fibro medicines. I owe a guy on EBay $18 for a boad game I bidded on two weeks ago. I need to find change, deposit it, and then pay for it. I'm also low on groceries and thank God Dad is able to pay for non perishable food with his check in advanced.

Today was probably my hardest day of work since I started. I forgot my medicine bag at home and no one could bring it today. I was in horrible pain all day and my boss even noticed that I looked sick. I was grateful to come home and take my medicine. I did manage to get a loyalty card even through this junk.

When I came home, Maggie, Dad, and I watched My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding and Pawn Stars. Dad helped me make my bed and we chit chatted about work, music, and what's going on in life. Maggie then spent an hour messaging my back. It has greatly helped reduced my pain. Poor Maggie, she then tripped and her knee is in a lot of pain. She can hardly bare any weight on it or bend it without stabbing pain.

To add to the mix, my boyfriend and I are having a rough time dealing with finding time for one another and how to deal with stress. We haven't had a date in Lord knows how long. It's been months since I had flowers. And the last time we did spent time together was when I washed laundry, he was editing his audio book, and then had dinner with his parents.  Plus, we've had frustrations about arguements. Any suggestions on how to balance work, family, boyfriend, searching for places to live, a car, and more jobs? I miss being a relaxed college kid.

I just noticed this is the weekend that my ex and I broke up a year ago. I no longer have romantic feelings for her but I miss her friendship and her family. Before dating, she was my best friend. We dated for awhile, broke it off, and she hasn't wanted to be friends since. I respect her choice but I do still miss her in that way.

It's now 4:25am. I had to get this off my mind. Thanks for listening.